Joy's Birthday Pictures!

Joy loved being the center of attention. She is enjoying playing with her new baby dolls and art supplies. We had a wonderful party with friends, cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents enjoying our new daughter!

My Amazing Daughter's Birthday!

I love my kids' birthdays! Every one of them. Clayton and I enjoy reminiscing about the day they were born... pregnancies, waiting, etc. We have memories of those first moments with those children that were physically born to us.

Our children born in our hearts are no different just with different memories. I think a lot about their first moments of life and wonder. Today I am wondering about Joy Wenqian. She was a few days old when she was brought to Guilin SWI so I wonder what her birthparents named her, what they are thinking today, whose eyes she has. As I painted her toes today I noticed that a few of her toes have a unique long look to them... who did she get that trait from? I know beyond a shadow of a doubt they love her because I love her. I don't like living with so many unanswered questions and I know she won't because already I see that she is that kind of girl. I also know that God has given her an amazing, remarkable spirit and understanding of the world around her. I know that the heartache that comes with living the life she has lived she will walk with grace. And as her mama I am priveledged to walk through this life with her.

She got her ears pierced for her birthday yesterday, went swimming, and we took her to our new favorite Chinese buffet. The people were so sweet and sang Happy Birthday to her and then started asking her questions in Chinese, of course. At some points she would look at me like please rescue me so I'd speak up and start talking to them to take the pressure off her. They were asking about us and I think she just wanted us to reassure them and her that we were in fact her family and she was in fact our daughter. That we were the blessed ones to have her instead of having to hear for the millionth time how lucky she was that we adopted her and that she was in America! After the talking she ate some cake and looked at me and said "Wo ai ni." I love you. Now she has said that before but after we say it to her.

It is just a gentle reminder how my very brave, tough, incredible, adaptive little girl needs some truth about how special she is to us and to her Creator! After all she picked out the best party theme for herself for her party today... princesses... because after all she is one! She is loving her earrings, her cake, her plates, her tiara! I'll have to post pictures of it all later.

I know I've written this before but we are so blessed to have our new daughter with us for her birthday! We may not know a ton about her first 9 years of life but we certainly won't be missing the rest of it!

There are so many people that have had an impact on her life. I wish her foster parents and grandmother could be here today to share it with her. I'd love to thank in person those that helped her receive her surgeries in China that literally saved her life. I really wish that her birthparents could be here and see Joy Wenqian. We have so much to thank them for... they gave our little girl life on this day nine years ago and we'll forever be grateful to God for them and for her.

Lots of exciting things!

Here are some pictures of Grace's last day at school, Field Day. She wanted us all to come and her teacher was sweet to let all our kids play games as well. Everyone had fun. Then we all went swimming at a local indoor pool and had a fun last day of school.

Isaac had his last soccer game this weekend so here are some pictures of him. Joshua also was signed up for soccer but didn't play. The anxiety was just too much for him and he was way too overwhelmed at everyone running around so he didn't finish out the year but since I paid for the trophy he got it!! Let's just say it'll be a few years until he gets signed up to play another sport but that's okay.

Joy couldn't be prouder of herself in learning how to ride a bike (in two weeks) and so are we!!! When you see the video please know that she has a purple princess bike but the training wheels were still on it and she was determined so I gave her Isaac's bike to try on and off she went. After Clayton got home he took the training wheels off her bike and she did just as well.

Joy is such a blessing to our family. Her 9th birthday is this week. She is going to get her ears pierced and enjoy and day of family and gifts just for her. She picked out a princess theme and I'll be making her a princess castle cake. There are so many emotions... I don't even know how to process them all. I thought I'd be grieving the 9 years we've lost with her but instead I'm so grateful for the 9 years of miracles that she had in China. I'm grateful for those that have prayed for her and supported her. I'm grateful for her birthparents for giving her life. I'm overwhelmed at the decision they felt they had to make to allow others to raise her. I pray for them alot and for her China family that loves her and cared for her through 2 surgeries and lots of memories that I'm sure she'll share in the months and years to come.

Meanwhile I'm trying to write down all the memories I have of her and our experience with her in China so that I can share details with her over time. I know from others' experience that she'll want to know any details we have. We are probably still in the honeymoon period but I'm content here even if I feel like there is so much more beneath her fun loving surface. In time those things will come out and I get to be here to walk through them with her. We are just super grateful for our new daughter and the Joy that she truly is! And even when this honeymoon is over we'll love her all the more because she IS our daughter!

An Honest Post and Really Great Pictures

We have had a full few days and Joy continues to do wonderfully. We've enjoyed swimming and playing in the sprinkler. Joy loves my favorite cat Elvis, named after the singer because he has extremely loud meowing. Joy is amazingly laid back and just goes with the flow. The sad part of that is that she probably has learned to do that to survive. Be happy, life just happens to me. I'm not complaining... it has made jet lag, language barriers much easier than they could be but.... Eventually I know her passiveness could harm her and will need to be addressed. Right now as she learns to trust us and in turn share her life with us we are really enjoying her. She enjoys new experiences and is very confident in new situations. She is very loving toward us... actually she is affectionate toward anyone that shows her attention in the least bit so those things will need to be addressed. I am glad that she seems to trust anyone and looks at life through rose colored glasses yet she doesn't grasp the difference between family relationships, friendships, acquantances, or strangers. The good thing is that she will let us help her do her hair, get dressed, even ask us for help with things so hopefully she will easily in time learn to distinguish family relationships from other relationships. We are glad we will be meeting with our social worker soon to talk with her about other things we can be doing before English language is established to help Joy with healthy relationships and development. So anyone that has any been there done that experience please offer advice for things to do before communication is established please share.

I also never posted about Joy's cardiologist appointment on Friday. AWESOME just doesn't seem to do what God has done for her heart! Our cardiologist said that from the echocardiogram and from the way her heart sounds now he would put her repair and how she is doing in the top 10% of repairs done anywhere. I think I've mentioned before that through a series of just miraculous events she was able to have her second heart surgery done by one of the top cardiologists in China at the age of 3 1/2. Another part of Joy's story is that through this series of miraculous events and God using His people the organization An Orphan's Wish raised money for her surgeries. Then through another series of miraculous, God-sized events we even know about the first two events and have met via computer some of the people He has used to help her. We have Skyped three times with them and they have shared with Joy about who Jesus and God are to which Joy said, "I've never heard that before." Makes my heart sad but happy that now she will hear about Him every day.

And now we pray even more diligently for those in China that don't know Him and especially her foster Nai Nai and her foster parents who are not believers yet. Her Nai Nai is 84 years old so I'm sure she has thought about eternity. The tears in her eyes as she was saying her good-byes to Joy will be a memory forever in my mind. If only they could see one another again in eternity! Here are some things and people that we will never forget and will pray for continually from our trip to China:

-Joy's foster Nai Nai and her foster mom and dad
-Bruce Lui (a guy we shared with on the train from Guilin to Nanning)
-John (our guide in Guilin)
-Ting Ting (our guide in Beijing that we left our Bible with)
-An Orphan's Wish, Grace and Hope Foster Care, Half the Sky, and Guilin Orphanage (all of these organizations have had an impact on Joy's life... they are able to help more children from donations and support... the first two are Christian organizations there in China as God's hands and feet loving the lonely and broken)

On a funny note here are the things I won't forget:
-Spending the last four hours of our long flight to China in the bathroom with Grace because her stomach was upset (you know how nasty those bathrooms are toward the END of the flight)
-I just thought the above was nasty until my new daughter, Joy, had to go to the bathroom REALLY bad on our train ride from Guilin to Nanning... words don't even come close... it was a squatty potty but the things that surrounded it, even coming out the door were just unimaginable. Faith had to go to and after telling her over and over you can hold it I took her and showed her and she put her hands over her face and said, "I'll wait."
-The smells of China... we went to the International Food Market on Saturday and I had to smile when I smelled it walking up. I looked at Grace and she had this little smile on her face kind of giggling. I'm so glad that they had this experience with us. Who would have thought our Walmart smells funny to others?

The Blending of Two Cultures... Signs that you are an Adoptive Family

I thought this was funny over dinner tonight. Joy eating with a fork and Grace with chopsticks. Grace actually has gotten pretty proficient at using chopsticks.

Our Hearts are Full!

We have had a wonderful few days. Having Clayton home for a few days has helped with jet lag and adjustment so much. We have just enjoyed being home and being together as a family. The pictures of the kids are of them watching a movie and Joy Wenqian was very tired, the second day home. There is one of them painting at the kitchen table, playing dress up, and her riding her beloved bike. We went swimming at a local pool yesterday and Joy Wenqian had a great time being independent without us watching her like a hawk since she had a life vest on this time. She absolutely loves riding her bike. Judging from her actions I don't think she had actually riden one before although I'm sure she had riden as a passenger in China on one. After thinking for so long that I'd be grieving missing out on her first almost 9 years of life it is fun to see her experience many firsts like riding a bike, being able to teach her to ride one without training wheels, swimming, dance lessons, first camping trip, first church service, and I was even there the first time she heard about Jesus, and I'm sure many other firsts we get to experience together.

Some of the people she knows from Guilin have been available to Skype with her over the past two weeks and she likes talking with them. She explained her American name, who God and Jesus are, and were able to get a few communication things out in the open and talked about. My friend that goes to UGA and is from China has been available to talk to her daily on the phone which has been extremely helpful. We hope to have some friends we know that were missionaries to Taiwan over this weekend to meet her this weekend. Food has been a difficulty for her. She is a picky eater anyway, even in China so western food is hard to get used to for sure. She does like Ensure though so that makes me feel better and she is taking a multi vitamin with iron and we are slowly finding things she likes that are nutricious. Like any child she doesn't have a hard time with the unhealthy things just the healthy ones. She just happens to be slightly underweight and height and have slightly low iron. It's caused me to take a good look at how well everyone else its eating to and made me give more healthy options for everyone so that has been nice.

She is such a joy to have as a child. The girls played dress up today and after she would add things to her costume she'd come down the stairs yelling "mommy" and I'd take photos of her posing. Then she'd want photos of her with her sisters too all dressed up. I was going to wait until next year to do dance lessons but I'm looking into a summer camp after seeing how much she likes it.

I got the paperwork I had on her ready today to take with me to her pediatricians visit. When I looked through what we had I was reminded of how sick of a child she once was and how God used people to literally save her life. I am also reminded of the fact that we could have easily told God "no" to her file because of how incomplete and uncertain things seemed about her. It hadn't been updated very well about how well she was doing now just how sick she was from birth until her second surgery at about 3 1/2 years. The point being that it was confirmation that whatever God tells us to do He will be faithful to handle the details and carry us through. We are not and were not guarantied that Joy would be healthy but we knew God was going to allow us to be her parents. She fits so amazingly well into her forever family. I know not all adoptions go this smoothly. Our first one was a struggle for at least 6 months. Just doing what God says to do is what we have to focus on. Joy Wenqian (which she is starting to like being called Joy) has her cardiologist appointment on Friday and I can't wait to tell him about all the people that God has used to be His hands and feet in her little life.

Grace, Faith, Isaac, and Joshua are all also doing very well. I realize we are probably still in the honeymoon phase of adoption but it's so fun to see them getting along so well and I feel like we are building trust and language skills to battle any upcoming issues.

We really do feel full of gratitude to God for our family of 7 and are amazed by His working in our lives!

Home

We made it home at about 1am Sunday morning. We were all so excited to be here. Joy Wenqian got excited when we pulled up and exclaimed, "Jia" (home). Then this morning, after I slept until 11am (thank you Clayton), Joy Wenqian went outside and took me to the front porch started pointing around and asked, "Ni de jia" (My home). It's so sweet to see her start putting pictures with reality. They are all playing nicely while we are resting and starting the putting away process.

In the picture of Joy and Faith they are putting on play make up in the mirror. So far Joy Wenqian is a girly girl. She likes make up, doing her hair, pink, playing the piano, singing, and riding her bike. It is so fun watching them all play at home together.

There are so many amazing things that we are putting together and processing now that we are home. There are many organizations that work with the orphanage Joy was in. One of the organizations is at www.anorphanswish.org. They are the ones that raised money for her surgery. One of the ladies that works with them was actually in her first surgery with her, praying for her. She even has a photo of her heart that she's sending us along with many other pictures and information about Joy Wenqian over the past 8 years. A group of bikers raised money and rode 1,000 miles to pay for one of her surgeries. Her foster family started caring for her after one of her surgeries. So she was with them since she was one years old. We are going to work on getting pictures together of her and us to send to her foster family and all those that have cared and loved her. The organization that she was sponsored in foster care through is at www.grace-hope.org. I really see the benefits of foster care when I compare our two adoptions. Joy Wenqian misses her China Nai Nai (foster grandmother) for sure and asks about her. We hope to get together with our friend from China to allow us all to better communicate tomorrow or Tuesday.

We'll update in a week or so as to how Joy Wenqian is adjusting. Language is definitely an issue but we are muddling our way through and know that it is short term. We'll have her pediatrician, cardiologist, and dentist appointments in the next few weeks so please pray for us and the doctors as we make decisions and gain information. Thank you for praying for us during our trip to China. It was wonderful and we are glad to be home with our new daughter. To God be the Glory!!

More pictures of our last day in China

 

Arrived in Beijing and now getting ready for re-entry

We arrived safely in Beijing on Thursday night very late. Our flight was delayed due to bad weather and it was one of the more turbulent flights I’ve been on. Unfortunately Grace seems to have some motion sickness and of all the medicines I did bring Dramamine is not one of them. She is not looking forward to the flight home but everyone is ready for their own beds. Even Joy got excited looking at pictures of her bed at home in the States.

 

We went to the Great Wall today and all of the girls really enjoyed themselves. I think we planned too much for the day because we were all EXHAUSTED and grumpy by the end of it but I’m glad we did the Great Wall first. They were running up the wall and wanting to go farther and farther up. Our guide took us to see the Silk Factory and Enamel Painting Factory. They made some beautiful things for sure but not quite in our price range except for a few Christmas ornaments and a glasses case for Grace that is really pretty. We also drove around Tiananmen Square and even fit in some much wanted swimming before bed. Wow… I’m tired just typing it all. Our guide did a great job explaining everything to all the girls and Joy Wenqian listened very intently when she’d explain in Chinese.

 

Joy Wenqian is still doing very well. Although I think she is in need of some consistency and not all this hotel hopping too. She got excited today when she realized she has 4 cats and a dog at home waiting for her. She said she’d like the orange one best… that’s my girl!

 

Please continue to pray for us as we travel over the next 2 days and as we become a new family of seven soon. We leave Saturday at 3:45pm China time and arrive in Atlanta, Lord willing, at 10:30pm Saturday night GA time. Thank you for all your prayers thus far and for your help.

 

Not long now Isaac and Joshua. We love you. Keep praying for us and we can’t wait to hug and kiss you ourselves. Love, Mommy and Daddy

And more pictures of our last day in China

 

More fun pictures of our day

Cute pictures of all the kids in our two families…. That are in China anyway. They left 6 kids at home. Aren’t you glad we only have two left with you Nana and Papa? We spent about 2 hours at the Starbucks on the island after our walk off the island in Guangzhou. It was nice just to sit and talk while the kids played. Now we are off to the swearing in ceremony at the Consulate…. After wiping the fish grime off our feet in the tub! J

 

We love you boys… being around Caleb (the other families son) we miss you terribly. He climbs everything just like you Isaac! J In only 3 days we’ll be home!

Shell Shock

Well we decided to venture off the island today with the family we are here with and we ended up on the loading docks. By the way their website address is www.xanga.com\journeytocaleb. Their family is great and they also have some great pictures of our family. The dad is a photographer. The pictures of the loading docks/ fish market street don’t do the experience justice. Let’s just say on our way back to the main street there was a dump truck like thing coming down the road sloshing water out the sides. We quickly dodged the water coming off the truck for obvious reasons.